I really need an avenue to rant, complain, whine etc., a place where I can express and write freely. And here I am again, choosing tumblr to rant.
I know its inappropriate of me to post anything online about my internship or my company. But I really need to let it all out. I hate how the previous intern has made it out of my company so happy and positive that she will join back the company once she graduates.
I am not saying that I am not happy about my job, what I do or that I don’t like the people there. I just have a problem coping with work life. I believe this whole problem stems from me and only I can help myself.
1. I HAVE NOT BEEN PAID SINCE FEB
The person who processes my pay went for a long long long (when I say long, he took like almost a month) trip and missed the date that I was supposed to be paid i.e. mid of the month. There was no handover list for anyone else to process our pay or whatnots. And once he was back for a week, he disappeared again for a work trip and there goes our pay.
He is lucky that the other intern and I are people who aren’t that needy of money. But still, I feel very very very undervalued if I’m not paid (yes I’m motivated somehow by money and yes, that’s superficial of me). I know we can always ask for our pay and all. But somehow, it’s hard for us to open our mouths to ask for money.
2. EVERY SINGLE PERSON IS OCD
Ok maybe the above is a sweeping statement. Not everyone is OCD but mostly are. They scrutinise at every minor mistake made or rather, even small little things like cutting newspapers in a straight line or having velcro hooked together properly. To start off, doing such mundane duties make me feel undervalued as an intern already. I know these are not comparable to interns who work in agencies. But still. I’m not even paid since Feb. Why would I even feel motivated to have mundane duties done properly.
3. EVERYONE IS NICE, IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD SOMETIMES
I know they say that professionals have to set aside feelings and get things done professionally. However, I cherish establishing relationships a lot. I cannot understand how someone I had good conversation with over lunch (thinking that we can be friends already) turned out to be someone OCD like above. I guess this is work life. We have to separate work from relationships and feelings. Sigh pie.
4. I’M JUST NOT READY FOR WORK LIFE
Judge me all you want. I’m probably not prepared for work life. I am already complaining about internship halfway through the period and even when I am not working in an agency.